I miss her so much.....there is a gaping hole where she used to be.......I have not posted much lately...I have been trying to find new ways to dull the ache that haunts me night and day...I thought maybe if I took a break and didn't post.....put away all the pictures, except the one I have in my locket that I wear around my neck.......I hoped it would help me to not think of her so much .........But alas ...it didn't work.

I did find out something interesting from my doctor.....I have been sick more this year than I have in the last 5 yrs combined and I was again calling him to see if I could get a refill for one of my many aliments....and we chatted for a moment ......He ran across some studies that show when a person goes through a sudden tragedy......that the brain reacts in the same way it does for someone who has had a sever head injury......so I am not going crazy as I supposed...... The doctor of course would like to put me back on anti-depressants...but I can no go there again!! I will just have to fight this one through......